John 21:1-19
In my humble opinion, Peter is far too
undervalued in the Protestant tradition, having been overshadowed in the
biblical witness by Paul. Not to
downplay Paul's critical role in Church doctrine and his ministry to the
Gentiles, but Peter has at least
as much to say based on his actual experiences with our Lord and in his letters
which, quite frankly, get to the point a whole lot quicker!
It is within this ironic shadow, then,
that Peter's restoration in John's gospel
is a significant step toward that glorious day of Pentecost when the Church
will be "breathed" into life - even with our flaws and short-comings!
Peter's experience during this encounter
makes me think of those moments so many of us let slip by us, moments we missed
when we could have actually made something right - whether we were at fault or
not - before it's too late. I am
especially mindful of these things whenever those who mourn the loss of a loved
one often have regrets of opportunities lost; some imagined, but some also very
real - and all gone forever.
In Peter's case, we should wonder how he may have been feeling about the
last time he saw Jesus alive; after he had boldly proclaimed he would give even
his very life for our Lord, and then how heart-broken he must have felt when
Jesus "accused" him of being less than honest about what he would be found
willing to endure.
I think we can be sure Peter meant every
word he spoke when he spoke them - just as you and I often do. I don't think Peter made his bold
proclamation simply because he thought Jesus would want to hear it, and I don't
Peter could possibly have envisioned what was to come and how he would get
caught up in it any more than we can envision a time when we might actually be
in mortal danger for our Lord's sake. It
happened, though, when Peter ran for his life after Jesus had been arrested,
and Jesus' "accusation" against Peter came to fruition when the cock
crowed - much to Peter's dismay and shame ... and profound regret.
Like every other Bible story, it is not enough
to simply read the account and let it go as an historical event with historical
players so far removed from us that we cannot imagine how the experience
matters to us today except perhaps by its political implications. This, I think, is the extraordinary challenge
of theology for our time: making everything matter to us by somehow
making these events moments we can experience for ourselves and learn from -
because until we do, Jesus and religion and faith will never be more than
abstract, feel-good, self-justifying notions we acknowledge from time to time
as it suits our purposes.
Of course we can never "unring a
bell", so it is always a mistake to live in or dwell on the past. There are consistent biblical witnesses from
the past, however, that remind us of timeless biblical AND HUMAN
truths; and these truths are often a bit more revealing than we are comfortable
admitting. Psalm 30 is just one example when the psalmist acknowledges his
faith in his "prosperity" (that is, when things
are good) as he writes: "I said in my prosperity, 'I shall
never be moved'." In other
words, when things are wonderful for us, our Lord is wonderful to
us. BUT the psalmist follows up: "Lord,
You hid Your face, I was dismayed."
Peter's "dismay" when he ran
for his own safety after his "prosperity" had dried up, when his idealistic
bubble had burst, is understandable to us - if we are willing to be honest with
ourselves. There is no need to ask for
trouble if trouble can be avoided, and we certainly do not understand
"martyrdom" the way Islamic terrorists seem to (nor does the Church even
teach such foolishness!). But when we
are so far removed from the story, we can kid ourselves into believing we would
have stood tall with Jesus on that Fateful Day.
I'm sure Peter thought so as well, but he didn't. Nor, I suspect, would we. So rather than live with and surrender to
that perpetual failure or simply hand over to Peter alone, how do we move
forward from that very dark moment?
When Jesus repeatedly asked Peter,
"Do you love Me?", we may be as perplexed, as confused, and as
dismayed as Peter was because our Protestant tradition has taught us that we
need only to "make a profession of faith" and "be right in our
hearts". And we have come to such a
careless and incomplete
conclusion not because of what St. Paul taught but rather because of a careless
interpretation of carefully selected verses taken out of their appropriate
contexts; one of the many flaws borne of the 16th-century Reformation. And yes, for all the good that came from the
Reformation, it also had its share of flaws; flaws that, rather than being
corrected over time, only perpetuated themselves.
Peter wanted Jesus to understand how he
"felt", how sorry he was - especially in this unforeseen moment when
Peter surely could see an opportunity otherwise lost to make things right once
again. Jesus, however, wanted to know
what Peter would actually be willing to "do". It would appear Jesus had little interest in how
Peter felt. I might also add that the
Lord did not seem to care how Abraham "felt" when he was asked to
offer Isaac as a sacrifice. Surely the
Lord knew what was in Abraham's heart, but the Lord also wanted to know what
Abraham was willing to "do" for our Lord.
It's hard to say whether or not Jesus is
actually challenging Peter's "heart".
It is harder still to remove ourselves from this moment because even
though we have not faced arrest and imprisonment - or death - in Jesus' name,
we can surely recall many moments of denial in our envy, our lusts, our cursing
and slander of our neighbors and one another, our denial of food to the hungry,
our heartless turning away of those who are marginalized by our dominant culture,
the withholding of our tithes and other offerings - all done and never repented
of, ironically, under our own individualized, and substantially flawed,
theology of "grace".
Denial of our Lord is not about whether
there is a single, solitary moment in our lives when we once said, "Yes,
Lord", though that is certainly the beginning; but it is NOT the end. Our denials move into Jesus' command to Peter
(and thus to the Church) to "feed My sheep" - that is, "DO" something. Peter's context may be a bit broader because
of his unique future in the Church, but our commission as the standing Body of
Christ in the world today is no less compelling.
Even if we can say from our hearts that
we do truly love our Lord, we cannot - we must not -
remove ourselves from Jesus' own commission in this moment when our Lord
essentially says to Peter - AND to the Church, "Your words, your
'profession of faith, has no meaning because I've seen what you do. I
know how you feel but for the sake of My Holy Church, for the sake of My beloved
'sheep', I'm gonna need to know what you are willing to do; how far you are
willing to go for My Sake and for My 'sheep'!"
"If anyone loves Me, he will keep
My word" (John 14:23). Sadly, the best we can do as the Church is to
argue over exactly what "word" Jesus was referring to when Jesus
Himself IS the Word. When
we witness or even participate in such nonsense, it can be said at that point
that we are no better off than Peter was just before he ran away. And this defies the Restorative Nature
of our Lord. We may continue to claim to
have been "saved" in some moment of spiritual or emotional distress
long ago but if we are unwilling to pursue that "word" in spirit and
in truth but would much prefer to argue about the semantics of what we
"have" to do, that moment of justification was just another abstract
notion of self-justification.
Jesus clearly did not give up on Peter
even though Peter had clearly once given up on Jesus, and that is a moment I
think we call all relate to on some level; however, we must never simply shrug
our shoulders and say, "oh, well; Jesus knows my heart". We must heed Jesus' words not for the sake of
our own souls, but rather for the sake of the "sheep" - for this is
the heart of the Holy Church. It is our
call; it is our commission. And it is
our opportunity to understand AND EMBRACE
the "Restorative Nature" of our Lord when we heed that commission -
and respond.
In the name of the Father, the Son, the
Holy Spirit. Amen.
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