Marriage is a big deal. The sacramental union of a man and a woman
together in our Lord's Holy Covenant is worthy of our prayers, worthy of serious
contemplation before entering into such union, and worthy of the full weight of
the Church's support not only when things go wrong but to also assure that
things stay right! When that union is
threatened in any way, the Church must be prepared and willing to engage in spiritual
battle because there is much more at stake that many of us realize. So it is significant in the Season of
Epiphany that this succession of events, from Jesus' baptism to Jesus' presence
at a wedding, reveals to us much more than Jesus' ability to change water into
wine as only a "sign to be believed".
We are also being shown much more than
Jesus affirming the sanctity of marriage between a man and a woman; the sanctity
of that reality is already affirmed in Genesis
2:24: "Therefore a man shall leave
his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one
flesh". In fact, it could
be said that Jesus' presence at the wedding is incidental because when He was
"invited", there is no indication that His role as Messiah was even
considered. Yet we are being shown by
His presence the covenantal relationship between the Lord and His Church;
between the Bridegroom who is Messiah and the Bride which is the Church. But we are not being shown this merely
by Jesus being present. There is much
more.
Perhaps it is that the significance of
running out of wine is not so much indicative of more guests showing up than
were anticipated but rather that there is only so much we can do within our limited
human capacity to anticipate and endure the reality of life's certain challenges,
especially for a married couple.
We must remember that in Jesus' day, they could not run to the corner
liquor store or the county line to get more wine! It had to be prepared beforehand. So perhaps it is that we begin to "run
on empty" (that is, 'fall out of love' or 'it wasn't meant to be') without
fully realizing the preparation work necessary before the wedding should even
take place (I do not mean planning the wedding!), not to mention the incredible
work that must be done to protect and preserve that union because it is a UNION OF TESTIMONY. But we must also realize, within the
sacramental context, that apart from our Lord, we can never really be prepared for
all that lay ahead.
The Roman Catholic Church has for
centuries maintained the integrity of matrimony as a bona fide Sacrament of the
Church, and it is a shame the reformers did not take more seriously the full
weight of what truly constitutes "sacramental" before they dismissed
all but two (baptism and the Lord's Supper).
It is a shame and a profound loss because when the sacramental nature of
marriage is diminished to a mere "ordinance" or when the
"sacramental nature" is removed altogether, we are left with little
more than a legal, perhaps social contract that can endure only for so long as
each party is willing; which is to say, only for so long as the "good
wine" lasts.
Calling marriage a
"sacrament", however, is no magic formula for success without
understanding what "sacramental" really means. When we understand Sacrament as "the
Lord's giving of Himself to us", we can see this more clearly in baptism
when we are given new life and we can appreciate its depth in the nourishment
of the Lord's Supper when we are renewed in repentance. Where the Lord "gives of Himself"
in marriage, however, is a little more elusive, a little harder to pin down
because in the beginning of just about any marriage, it's all about mutual
attraction, infatuation, idealism, and romanticism. We often hear that "I want to spend the
rest of my life with him/her", but we rarely (if ever) hear, "I want
to glorify our Lord's Covenant with humanity through my union with my beloved". And we don't hear this because it is likely
the very LAST thing on a couple's mind.
Which may beg the question: Did the Lord
give us marriage, or did He enter into marriage in order to make it mean
something, to give it depth; that is, the depth of a Covenant as a UNION OF TESTIMONY rather than
as a mere partnership of convenience?
The Season of the Epiphany has a natural progression to this end in that
while we are told of Jesus' special role as Messiah by the presence of the
Gentile "wise men" who were led from afar and by His baptism when the
"Spirit descended as a dove", we are now introduced to the
fulfillment of that special role in the nature of the Covenant between the Holy
God and the unholy human race for the sole purpose of sanctifying us to Himself.
So just as it is that baptism by water
is an "outward sign of an inward grace", society is shown the "outward
sign" of the Covenant by the sacrament of marriage made sacramental
not by a priest but by the intentional commitment each partner has to the other
"for better AND for worse, in wealth AND in poverty, in sickness AND in
health"; that is, "sacrificially", "sacramentally". The covenant commitment we make to our
spouses in giving ourselves completely to them is one and the same sacrament
attested to in our Lord giving Himself to us in the new birth (justifying
grace) and in continuing to grow in love and mutual support and nurture of one
another in the faith (sanctifying grace); "going on to perfection" but
recognizing that perfection that can never be achieved by man alone.
Make no mistake. A sound and fruitful marriage is no accident,
and it does not "just happen" as a matter of fate (fond as that
unbiblical notion may be). And while it
is true that it "takes two to tango", it is equally true that a marriage
can rise to new heights by the genuine commitment, perseverance, and
self-sacrifice of only one just as a marriage can be utterly destroyed by the
irresponsible, selfish, and often devious and diabolical acts of only one. The challenge of the sacramental marriage is
of the very same nature as that of the sacramental commitment to the Divine
Covenant, the fulfillment of which is portrayed by the "new wine",
the "good wine" at Cana - made possible only by the hand of our Lord.
There is therefore much more to this
commitment than just being happy with one another, much more than mutual compatibility. The nature of "sacrament" is
attested to in our understanding of discipleship and the important role
marriage and family life play in this understanding. Author Josh Hunt writes in his book,
"Disciple-making teachers", that there is no greater public testimony
to the unity of Messiah to YHWH and the Church to Messiah than by Jesus'
statement and prayer in John 17:23
when He prays, "May they be brought to complete unity to
let the world know that you sent Me ..." The writer states, "Do you understand the significance of
Jesus' words? It is almost as though
Jesus is turning to the world and saying, 'If My people don't love each other,
you have My permission to believe I did not come". Wow.
The writer is not talking about the
absence of divorce because, clearly, that ship has long sailed. Rather he is talking about the presence of passion
and purpose within the marriage covenant, the very same passion you and I need
to have toward the Lord - the very same passion our Lord has for us ... as
attested to at Calvary! The Lord could
have simply "willed" that all are saved, but He didn't do any
"magic trick" nor did He simply take for granted that one day
everyone would know of His Love. He found
it necessary to SHOW His love with intention.
He found it necessary to PROVE His love with purpose. With complete disregard for Himself. This relationship in our Lord's heart does
not merely "exist", nor should our marriages simply "exist";
because what merely "exists" is, more often than not, taken for
granted and neglected to its detriment and eventual annihilation.
You want to know why people don't take
the Church seriously anymore? It is because we do not take marriage or our
spouses seriously anymore. We use these,
more often than not, as means convenient to our own selfish ends. So when we do not take our spouses and our
marriages seriously but simply let them "exist" as long as we are
personally satisfied (so long as the wine holds out), we testify to the world
that we do not take our Lord and our relationship with Him seriously. We give them "permission", as the
writer stated earlier, "to believe Jesus never came". We give them permission to believe such Love
does not exist.
Jesus elevated the status and role of
marriage by the "new wine", the "sign" of His remarkable
presence in what was once an ordinary social event. He portrayed YHWH's passion for us in the
"new, superior wine", making the ordinary extraordinary ... not
merely for the wedded bliss of the happy couple but for the WORLD TO SEE
where He is in our lives! It is a
Perpetual Feast worth celebrating not only on the wedding day but each and
every day to testify to the Goodness of our Lord and His commitment to US!
It is discipleship at its finest. It is relationship at its fullest
potential. It is Life in the Eternal
Covenant. It is, at its very best,
"Emmanuel"; God with us. Amen.
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